for my american visa
application i prepared as many
documents as possible with special permission from my uncle
my mothers fame and fathers business standings mentioned
my salary was shown as 16000 rupees monthly
i was made a partner in a family firm…work field increased
personal bio data was hugely exaggerated
huge financial deposits were shown in my name
a first class ticket to america was procured
with a stopover in thailand for holidaysi wore
the best suit and tie carried an expensive briefcase
and appeared before the american visa section
i was going to america as my parents promised me a holiday
they were rich and famous
that i intended to travel abroad frequently was what i stated
when asked if i would work in america
i retorted and asked if i looked like a servant to them
that was enough…the woman interviewer was embarrassed
the american way…judge a book by its cover
i got my first three month multiple entry visa for america in
january 1982…ten months for all this to fall into place
celebrations…i had earned my ticket
my american visa…800 dollars
bhagwan here i come
my travel agent who had a bet with me said
the word impossible does not exist in the dictionary of rajnish
twenty years old…my first travel out into the world
i arrive in bangkok
of course the first visit to the night life of pat pong
never seen such swinging people into the night
all drinking and dancing with abandon
i loved what i saw but felt shy and completely out of place
a fish out of water
and not carrying much money except the 800 dollars
went back to the guest house
three nights in bangkok
on to tokyo for one night stopover
it was 31 december…new years eve
too expensive to venture out
the airline put us up in narita in a beautiful hotel
they arranged champagne for all at the rooftop bar
i could feel that i simply did not belong in such situations
had my dinner and went to sleep
morning flight to los angeles
flying over the international dateline
new year celebrations again…was this a good omen
celebrating the new year twice
first landing in america…surprised that i just felt normal
and no real excitement to be in the usa at twenty years of age
i felt lost and totally confused at the vast distances in los angeles
just cars and cars and freeways and freeways
how and where did people actually meet
this was alien country for me
i felt really miserable and disconnected with whatever i see
i was to meet my friend in san diego
who would help me in america and arrange to get me to oregon
took the greyhound and arrived in san diego
felt much better there…the beaches and the city were more accessible
one actually could see people strolling about on the promenade
instead of arranging to help me get to oregon
i soon realise that my friend just needed someone to share the expenses
in his apartment as this started to finish all my money
i called oregon and they immediately began with
what visa did i have and as an indian how long was i allowed to stay
how much money was i carrying
that 50000 dollars was required to live in the commune
i simply could not understand what these people were talking about
they seemed distant and cold…i knew my trip to oregon would not happen
i felt disconnected towards the commune
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