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- Celibacy can only be spontaneous, there is
no other type of celibacy. If it is not spontaneous, it is not
celibacy. You can force it. you can control your sexuality, but that
is not going to help. You will not be celibate, you will be only
more and more sexual. Sex will spread all over your being. It will
become part of your unconscious. It will move your dreams, it will
become your motivation in dreams, it will become your fantasy. In
fact, you will become more sexual than you ever were before. You
will think more about it and you will have to repress it again and
again.
And whatsoever is repressed has to be repressed again because
victory is never complete. There is no way to destroy sex by force,
by violence. There is no way to control and discipline it. The
people who have tried to control and discipline it have made the
world very pornographic. Your so-called saints have a very
pornographic mind. If a window can be created and a hole can be made
in their heads, you will be able to see just sex, pornography. it is
bound to be so. It is natural.
Never enforce any celibacy on yourself. Try to understand what
sexuality is, go deep into it. It has a tremendous beauty of its
own. It is one of the profoundest mysteries of life. Life comes out
of it -- it has to be a great mystery. Sex is not sin; repression is
a sin. Sex is very natural, very spontaneous. You have not done
anything to have it, it is inborn, it is part of your being. Don't
condemn it, don't judge it, don't fear it, don't fight with it.
Simply go into it more -- more meditatively. Let it happen in such
silence, in such deep acceptance, that you can know the very core of
it. The moment you penetrate to the very core of sexual orgasm you
will see sex is losing its appeal for you, you r energy is moving in
a higher plane, you are becoming more loving and less sexual. And
this happens spontaneously.
- Try to force celibacy upon yourself
and your dreams will become sexual, they will have a quality of
sexuality.
- People who try to control themselves have
chosen a very foolish way. Control will not happen, but they will
become cold. That is the only way a man can control himself -- to
become frozen so that energy does not arise. People who take the
vows of celibacy will not eat much; in fact, they will starve their
bodies. If more energy is created in the body, then there will be
more sex energy, and then they don't know what to do with it. So
Buddhist monks eat only once a day -- and then too, not enough. They
eat only enough that bodily needs are fulfilled, very minimum needs,
so no energy is left. This type of celibacy is not celibacy. When
you are flowing with energy and the energy starts transforming
itself into love, then a celibacy, a BRAHMACHARYA, which is
beautiful, happens.
- I have come across people who think that
without long fasting there is no possibility of meditation. Now,
fasting has nothing to do with meditation. Fasting will only make
you obsessed with food. And there are people who think celibacy will
help them into meditation. Meditation brings a kind of celibacy, but
not vice versa. A celibacy without meditation is nothing but sexual
repression. And your mind will become more and more sexual, so
whenever you sit to meditate your mind will become full of
fantasies, sexual fantasies. These two things have been the greatest
problems for the so-called meditators: fasting and celibacy. They
think these two things are going to help -- they are the greatest
disturbances!
Eat in right proportions. Buddha calls it "the middle way": neither
too much nor too little. He is against fasting, and he knows it
through hard experience. For six years he fasted and could not
attain to anything. So when he says, "Be in the middle," he means
it. About celibacy also: don't enforce it upon yourself. It is a
by-product of meditation, hence it cannot be enforced before
meditation. Be in the middle there too, neither too much indulgence
nor too much renunciation. Just keep a balance. A balanced person
will be more healthy, at ease, at home. And when you are at home,
meditation is easier. What then is meditation? Just sitting silently
doing nothing, witnessing whatsoever is happening all around; just
watching it with no prejudice, no conclusion, no idea what is wrong
and what is right.
- In the name of celibacy, sex has been
repressed for centuries and you have become just full of sexuality.
Rather than transcending it you are boiling within.
- Remember, there are two types of
celibates. One: who has simply forced celibacy upon himself -- he is
a wrong type, he is doing violence to himself. The other: who has
tried to understand sexuality, what it is, why it is; who has
watched, observed, lived through it, and, by and by, has become
aware of its futility; by and by, has become aware of a deep
frustration that comes after EACH sexual act. In the sexual act you
have a certain thrill, a moment of forgetfulness, a moment of
oblivion. You feel good -- for a few seconds, only for a few
seconds, you drop out of this routine world. Sex gives you a door to
escape into some other world -- which is non-tense; there is no
worry; you are simply relaxed and melting. But have you observed?
After each sexual act you feel frustrated.
Sex has promised too much, but it has not been supplied. It is
difficult to find a man or a woman who does not feel a little
frustrated after the sexual act, who does not feel a little guilty.
I am not talking about the guilt that priests have imposed upon you.
Even if nobody has imposed any guilt upon you, you will feel a
little guilt -- that is part, a shadow of the sexual act. You have
lost energy, you feel depleted, and nothing has been gained. The
gain is not very substantial. You have been befooled, you have been
tricked, by a natural hypnosis -- you have been tricked by the body,
you have been deceived. Hence comes a frustration.
- That's why real awareness always leads you
beyond sex, and celibacy happens on its own accord. Because to be in
sex you have either to be identified with the male or identified
with the female. A real celibate is one who has gone beyond, who is
neither.
- Celibacy is one of the most unnatural
things. It has destroyed so many human beings -- millions --
Catholic monks, Hindu monks, Buddhist monks, Jaina monks, nuns. For
centuries they have been teaching celibacy; and the most amazing
thing is, even in the twentieth century, not a single medical
expert, physiologist, has stood up and said that celibacy is
impossible, that in the very nature of things, it cannot happen.
To impose celibacy means to pervert the sexual energy of man. It is
celibacy that has created homosexuality. It is celibacy that has
created sodomy. Perhaps you don't understand the word "sodomy"; it
is making love to animals. And, finally, it is celibacy which has
brought humanity to experience the great joy of AIDS. I call AIDS a
religious disease. It has been created by all the religions. Nobody
ever has been celibate, whatever the pretensions; you can only be a
hypocrite. But your sexual energy will find ways to move -- it is
natural.
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