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Osho - Truth is pure Awareness
Question:
Beloved Osho, Once some years ago, while making
love, I disappeared. I would like to say, " Literally
Disappeared," because I felt as if all of me simply
vanished. But certainly my body must have been there,
because my partner didn't notice that he was suddenly
alone. I heard my voice say: " I am going," and then
possibly only for a second or two, no one was there.
Though I have had moments of joy while love making
since, I have always been present to know that they are
moments of joy. Presumably ecstasy was the trigger for
what happened, but the happening itself wasn't ecstatic,
it wasn't anything, it simply was. Is meditation that
previous stage of ecstasy, or that state of not - even
ecstasy, just isness.
Osho: Ecstasy or
blissfulness are all toys to allure you towards
meditation. You will find them only in the beginning. As
the meditation grows deeper there is only isness.
Everything disappears, even ecstasy, because ecstasy
too, carries with it, just behind it, the shadow of
agony. It is a duality. Blissfulness carries with it,
hiding behind it, suffering, misery. It is a duality.
Only isness is not a duality because isness is simply
synonymous with existence, and there is no
non-existence.
Anything can trigger it. Love is one of the most likely
things to trigger it because you are so totally
in it, so intensely in it and without any effort. It
is a biological help to man to experience his first
isness. It can be scary to feel that you have literally
disappeared, and to tell your partner, I am going,
rather than I am coming! is to kill the poor man!
What is happening? What kind of love is
happening?
He has always heard that in love one comes, but this is
a rare quality to be going! The man must have been
cultured; otherwise he would have got up and said, I am
going also! you are going what am I doing here? He
was a man of culture and etiquette that he remained!
But coming and going both are two sides of the same
coin. People have noted only the coming; they have not
been sharp enough to see the other side of it. The
moment of coming is simultaneously the moment of going.
You as a personality, you as an ego, are going; you as
pure isness, are coming. So they are not contradictory,
they are complementary.
But it can be triggered anywhere... sometimes for no
reason at all just the situation and you may
not be able even to know what has triggered it. I used
to go for a morning walk, and I used to pass a beautiful
house every day that was my route.
And one day, when I was coming back, the sun was just
shining on my face; I was perspiring I
had gone for four, five miles, and just... I could not
move from that place. I must have been eighteen
or seventeen. Something happened between the sun and the
beautiful morning, that I simply forgot
that I have to go home. I simply forgot that I am. I was
simply standing there.
But the man who owned the house, he has been watching me
for almost a year that I come and go by the side of
the house; today, what has happened? I am simply frozen.
But frozen in such ecstasy!
He came and shook me, and it was like coming down from a
very far away place, rushing into my body. He said,
What has happened?
I said, Thats what I was going to ask you. Something
certainly happened, and something that I would like to
happen forever. I was not. You unnecessarily got
worried, shook me, and brought me back. I had moved into
some space which was absolutely new to me and it was
pure isness.
Anything can do, it seems that just your preparedness,
knowingly or unknowingly, your closeness to
the point where the phenomenon can be triggered.... But
this kind of experience is not within your
power. It happens to you like lightning. You cannot do
anything to bring it back, unless you start with a
device that suits you; for example, if relaxation suits
you, then whenever you have time, relax and relaxation
does not mean that you have to lie down and relax. You
can go on walking and relax.
You can go on working, but in a relaxed way. No tension,
no hurry, no speed, nowhere to go... just in the moment.
And the window will be opening again and again and more
often, and one day it remains open forever. It is pure
isness.
Chetana has asked one question: when awareness is total
and all thoughts disappear, does enlightenment,
realization, or any other experience happen or only the
awareness remain? The truth is that all experiences are
lower. Truth is not an experience. It has to be said
that it is an experience; otherwise how to convey it to
you?
Truth is pure awareness. Just all is, and all is
beautiful, and all is benediction. But the basic quality
is of awareness. You can call it isness.
The Sanskrit word for theist is astik. It is a beautiful
word, distorted because of the association with God.
Astik comes from the root, ast, and asti means isness.
In that sense, nobody is astik by believing in God;
astik is one who has come to the state of isness, and
this state is not separate so there is no way of it
going away; it remains. All words silence, peace,
ecstasy, blissfulness fall short. The juice of isness
is far deeper, far juicier than any word that any human
language can provide.
Source - "The Transmission of the Lamp" -
Osho
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