Jiddu Krishnamurti on Attachment
Question: Attachment brings
about a kind of emotional exchange, a human warmth, which seems a
fundamental need. Detachment produces coldness, lack of affection, a
break in relationship; it can also deeply hurt others. Something seems
to be wrong with this approach. What do you say?
Jiddu Krishnamurti -The word `attach' means to
cling, to hold, to have the feeling that you belong to somebody and that
somebody belongs to you. Cultivating detachment breeds lack of
affection, a coldness, a break in relationship; it is the cultivation of
Naturally it will. If detachment is the opposite of
attachment, then that detachment is an idea, a concept, a conclusion
that thought has brought about as a result of realizing that attachment
produces a lot of trouble, a lot of conflict, jealousy and anxiety. So
thought says, "It is much better to be detached." Detachment is a
non-fact, whereas attachment is a fact. When there is attachment, to
cultivate detachment is a movement towards illusion and in that illusion
you become cold, hard, bitter, isolated without any sense of affection.
That is what we are all doing: living in non-fact.
Can you face the fact that you are attached - not only
to a person, to an idea, to a belief, but to your own experiences, which
is much more dangerous? Your own experiences give you a sense of
excitement, a sense of being alive.
If one is aware that one is attached one sees all the consequences of
that attachment - anxiety, lack of freedom, jealousy, anger, hatred. In
attachment there is also a sense of safety, a sense of stability, a
sense of being guarded, protected. And so there is the possessor
and the possessed and hence there must be jealousy, anxiety, fear and
all the rest.
Now, do you see the consequences of all that - not the description of it
but the actuality of it? I am attached to you out of my loneliness and
that attachment, arising from loneliness, says, "I love you". I feel a
communication because you are also in the same position. Two people
cling to each other out of their loneliness, out of their depression,
out of their unhappiness. So what happens? I am
clinging not to you, but to the idea, to something which will help me to
escape from myself.
You may be attached to an experience, to an incident, which has given
you great excitement, a great sense of elation, a sense of power, a
sense of safety and you are clinging to that. That experience, which you
have had, what is it? That experience is registered in the mind and you
hold it. That something you are holding on to is dead and you also are
becoming dead. If you see all this, without any direction, without any
motive, just observe it, then you will see that insight shows the whole
thing as on a map. When once there is that insight the thing disappears
completely, you are not attached.
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Would you please explain what you mean by
To live a life without any conflict requires
a great deal of understanding of Oneself
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